Let 'em eat cake

All of this talk about money and the economy is making me grouchy. I don't like being grouchy, it is not my nature. But now, it has been suggested that my talents as a knitter don't transcend into my general domestic skill set. Unfortunately for us domestic workers, our jobs can't be outsourced. Talk about a budget crisis. Imagine if every man had to bring in private contractors to tend to all of their needs?? Yes it is true, some of them do privatize some aspects of their lives (see Elliot Spitzer and a zillion other politicians). We know how expensive that becomes for just one measly (well maybe not so measly) outsourced job!

At a recent budget conference, it was suggested that I review ways that I could cut back. Hmmmmm. Immediately, ideas came to mind. I could stop buying diamonds but DeBeers would probably go bankrupt which wouldn't be a bad thing except I haven't bought diamonds since I learned what happens to miners who work to get those lovelies out of the ground.

It was suggested that I not buy too many clothes. While I don't sew my clothes, I wonder just how much longer I could stretch my size 8 clothes into my growing, perimenopausal size 10 frame? Which brings me to groceries. Cutting back on groceries was seriously reviewed. If I didn't eat so much and encouraged others to do the same, we could save a mint (I used to grow mint but nobody really noticed). I am a bad domestic engineer it has been determined. I pay too much for food. I reluctantly had to agree this point due to the recent Whole Foods beef recall. I've been buying Whole Foods beef forevah thinking that the 50% markup helped ensure that I wasn't eating diseased, penned up and barely- alive- stock. So yeah, I could save with groceries by cutting out those nice juicy steaks and organic burgers. Did somebody say dollar menu?

Let's see, what else. Oh, right, the yarn. Which my shrink (if I had one) would probably say is the real source of the conflict. I could stop buying yarn. And by extension, I'd have more time to clean and cook and launder and contemplate "reclaiming the home". I contemplated drugs instead...


Then, the existential in me wondered, WWJD?

After close reflection, I realized that for twenty five years, I had been getting it all wrong. My one indulgence

could have been solved by just saying no. Who knew that Nancy Reagan was right afterall...

Anyway, is it obvious I'm in a funk? My Pal Phyllis came to the rescue. She brought some yummy wild blueberry muffins that she picked and baked...

Brought tears to my eyes...

And, Phyllis and I have been doing this sock KAL. Yes the yarn cost $11 bucks (a 20% sale at her LYS). Where else in America can you get great friendship, and stuff to do for 11 bucks and end up with a pair socks in the process?

Simply Lace Socks, Interweave, '06

My first attempt at the pattern was done totally wrong. When you are blind with rage, I guess lace charts can be misinterpreted. I had to frog it. Here is the improved version...


I was so excited that I was able to "self correct" and catch up with my buddy, I took the one sock out to the pool, and in solidarity with the USA's swim team's successes we took a dip -



Don't try this at home, the pool hasn't been chlorinated in days due to budget constraints so there was no real danger of bleaching out these lovely Louet Gems Opel orange tones.

Phyllis then suggested we go on a really cheap adventure to a local flea market to just enjoy looking at all of the old stuff...

Imagine having to wash clothes in one of these buckets? Talk about domestic servitude??

I bought a bag of buttons for a buck and two mason jars for two bucks! You see, I am good at this economics thing.

To shake off all of these worries, I've decided to throw myself into Ravelry's Olympics. Lots of knitting without buying new yarn, lots of hours watching some of the best physiques in the world and I'll get lots of finished garments in the bargain. So, stay tuned to my progress and what I hope to finish before China's closing CG ceremony. Sometimes virtual ain't so bad.

Fits and Starts

Fits
I've been collecting Obama stuff. I mean, you all know, I collect yarn. I've not shared all the other crap, junk, collectibles I enjoy hoarding, collecting.


Who could resist, Obama lip balm? Right? I mean who came up with that idea?

I have Lady Bird Johnson pens, Kennedy biographies, Nixon videos, Johnson tapes. A compulsion you ask? Hardly. Look at this, it's what my pal Phyllis sent me this morning. Now collecting Pyrex is a compulsion!

Starts

Remember I told you all about this project. Not done anything with it since I started it. Who knew that knitting with nubby, bulky yarn could cause your wrists to seize?

Fits
I spent the day in the ER on Saturday. I was coming out of the bank and all of a sudden I felt panicky, my palms were sweating and my heart started racing. I've been to the bank in the past when they were just about ready to slap me because of my poor accounting but that didn't happen this time. I honestly thought I was about to have a heart attack!

I drove myself to the ER, we have a hospital right in town. Five hours later, I'm hooked up to all kinds of machines and some kind of IV drip to inject dyes into my blood so that the CAT scan could see where it is my last serving of Fettuccine Alfredo got clogged in my arteries. But they found Nada. Nothing. Good thing I suppose. My doctor asked me how many kids I had. When I told him that I had 3 teenage boys. He actually gasped when he noticed my age (49) and said that I was probably starting perimenopause or my kids were working my last nerve. Actually he didn't say any of that but he did channel those thoughts into my head by the look he gave me when he said that living in Ridgewood is very stressful. What the %$#$ does that mean? Sarcasm, I hate it when other people use it against me. Geez.

Starts
As I was getting dressed I overheard a nurse pleading with a very old woman across the hall to take off her girdle. This was going on while I was pulling and tugging with my jeans to get them over my hips and fastened. Girdle? People still wear girdles?

"I don't feel dressed if I don't have on my girdle." says the old lady
"Well exactly, Mame, I'm trying to get you to unwind and relax until the doctor comes in."
"I would never see the doctor without my girdle on, nurse."

As I fumbled with my zipper, it hit me. I could buy a girdle and this would go so much better. Sure, I'd probably do irreparable harm to my internal organs but I could finally tuck my shirts in again.

Exhibit A:

I'm going to order a dozen!

Fits
Etsy. It's become an illness. You could actually go shopping there and never hit the same store twice. Look what I had to have for just $15 bucks


It's a kit I bought from Heather Knitz. It's knit with strips of fabric. Really nice but I feel my wrists seizing...

Starts
One of my favorite blogs is, Through the Loops. You can find lots of great stuff to knit over there. I'm doing these, now that I'm out of Jaywalker purgatory:

Achillea and Anna's Socks. Isn't it pretty, I'm using Dream in Color's Smoochy

I've got a whole lot more stuff on the needles but I enjoy the variety, I make no excuses just enjoy being able to knit what I want when I want, no pressure, no goals just knitting.

It's all Ravelry's fault

So, I'm minding my own business, checking out the pages over on Ravelry when someone posts a picture of some Peaches & Cream dishcloth yarn. It caused me such a dilemma. I had sold off most of my dishcloth yarn some months ago and thought I'd give that fad a rest for a while.

Alas, I couldn't resist those colorways


Those people over at Elmore-Pisgah must have used magic to process my order because I got my package in just a couple of days. And, to make matters worse, I learned that their plant is in North Carolina, the grand state where my son's tuition payments goes! Now, I can't wait for Homecoming weekend!

I did set some rules with this repeat fad. I must churn out a bunch now. So check out what I've done so far. Instant gratification love:

I made several Valentine's themed cloths to give away

Mary Anne over on Miss Wolly Knits shares her lovely Feather and Fan recipe. It is a breeze to knit. I could make these all day.

I've always admired Hakucho's ball band cloths so I thought I'd give it a try myself

Chairpads are now in my future!

Uneasy EZ mittens

I'm not one for fads. I am very impressionable though when it comes to knitting - is that the same thing? Last week I got together with fellow blogger Beate and her friend Erin. We sat in Beate's lovely kitchen and drank delicious pressed coffee and ate homemade cookies while we knitted and chatted about knitting projects as if we were planning dinner (projects that were marinating) or what to do about misbehaving children (projects given a time out).



I realized that the 3 of us were knitting a bunch of internet popular knits: Dashing fingerless mitts; Grumperina's Jaywalker socks; Knitty's Colorimetry headband and Jared's Elizabeth Zimmerman's Mitered Mittens from EZ's Knitter's Almanac.

Beate's friend was knitting up a pair of Dashing using a shockingly scrumptious Bernat yarn (65% acrylic, 30% nylon and a mere 5% cashmere but what the hey?). It really did feel like true cashmere so the next day I bought 2 skeins.




This is my version of Dashing, demented isn't it? I don't know how I did those crooked cables but I tried to divert attention away from them with the cutesy bow.


That's Beate modeling one of her lovely shawls and the mitts that got my attention. For the next two basketball games I tried making my own version but instead of using Silk Garden as Beate did, I decided on Kureyon. I've got a bunch of skeins to burn since I've decided not to knit that other internet fad - the Lizard Ridge afghan.

Ok, so when I got home, I dug out my Knitter's Almanac and browsed through Jared's blog to see if he translated oracle Zimmerman's pattern into something spazzes such as myself could follow. Nope. His is equally vague. So I say to myself, "self, you are a self respecting knitter, figure it out!"


My thumbs fit fine but they look oh, so wonky! Onto the superfriends site, Ravelry. There's bound to be some instructions that are not pitifully "pithy". I found that Grace, had some ideas and she even emailed me to help but I'm sorry to say that my results looked nothing like her lovely ones.

I decided to plunge forward and do my thumbs the EZ way. I almost wanted to close my eyes before I snipped -

EZ says to cut into the finished mitten just where you want the thumb to be. Yites!

Then pick up the loose stitches...

So far so good...

Not bad, right?

EASY afterall!

Politics, knitting and banking - oh my!

During this campaign season, I'm getting a lot of knitting done. I used to be a political maniac until 8 years ago, when the political landscaped changed to a totally unsurveyable cesspool of partisanship. That's when I picked up my needles again. I decided then that I was going to knit my way through all of the confusion. I read Greg Palast's, The Best Democracy Money Can Buy. I learned that our voting rights ain't all that it is cracked up to be and that campaigns will probably go the way of that American Idle tv show.

Enough about that except after the crazy New Hampshire primary, my manic knitting has begun again...

Do you think if I cried, I'd be able to get out of Jaywalker purgatory?
I'm not allowed to move on to a different sock pattern until I master this one.

Which candidate is the most photogenic?
I finished this hat at one of my son's marathon basketball games (he plays Varsity and JV) 3 hours of basketball = 3 hours of knitting!

I gussied up the hats I made for my son's coach's new baby.
Do candidates kiss babies anymore?

These cute buttons are from Modern Yarn in Montclair, NJ.
Now that those pesky FDA regulations have been removed, it just might be healthier to eat these!

Look!

My pal Phyllis gave me this fun gag gift. It's a bank for me to save up for yarn! This will seriously come in handy with the recession looming. I wonder what Neil Bush thinks about the mortgage crisis?

Don't you just love this!